Anxious Being Anxious 2016-09-09

LipsAre you anxious? Do you feel overwhelmed? Are you a nailbiter, outrageous shopper, hoarder, obsessive compulsive or any one of thousands of things people hide behind when they’re stressed or anxious? Anxiety is extremely complex. It affects bazillions of people. Well, millions anyway.

If you find yourself depressed, crying, difficulty or inability to be social, or to feel ‘normal’ in your world, please do not hesitate to seek professional help. Will all your problems magically disappear? Not unless you’re incredibly blessed, but you will be able to begin to get a handle on what may be contributing to such distress; life skills to inhabit such as soothing music, yoga, reading, meditation;  creative outlets like art, writing, gardening; and possibly even prescribed medication by a doctor. My advice to anyone would be not to self-medicate by using substances for a short-cut to perceived happiness. Alcohol or non-prescribed drugs only acerbates the dilemna enhancing your torment in the long run.

Anxiety is definitely not something to be shy about or ashamed of. The more you share with  people in your inner circle, the better. Hiding ‘big secrets’ can make someone really anxious. While nobody wants a whiny, needy, high-maintenance person weighing them down, there is a balance to be struck when dealing with anxiety in anyone’s life.  It’s give and take on both sides.

I have an amazing young person in my life who has been treated for anxiety.  As a young teem she has some sage words of wisdom and insight to offer on this subject, which I’m sharing with you here.

She added a comment in response to the following meme:

Things not to do when dating a girl with anxiety:

  • Do not wait hours to text her back, thus leaving room for her anxiety to kick in and her mind to over think. Overthinking kills her confidence and jeopardizes your relationship just based on what she is thinking.
  • Do not ever let her think she is unloved. Whether it’s a simple goodnight text or a random compliment, these little things put a person with anxiety in a more relaxed state.
  • Do not poke fun at her illness. She understands it sounds crazy but she does hate it , and she can’t do much about it. This is where you need to step up and make sure she knows you are going to be by her side through whatever crazy things she has made up in her head.
  • She needs consistency because without it, her mind wanders to all the worst outcomes.


This isn’t just with a boyfriend, but with anyone. If you know someone with anxiety, please support them through their whole journey and let them know that you care. This can be as simple as ordering their food at a restaurant for them if they are uncomfortable with that, or returning a clothing item for them to the store they bought it from. Anxiety is something that many people are ashamed of when they shouldn’t be, so please don’t question them when it comes to how they are feeling the way they are or why they can or can’t bring themselves to do something in a situation where they are feeling anxious.

Free yourself from feeling trapped and lousy. Take that courageous revolutionary first step toward obtaining relief from this common stratum. Allow your family, friends, teachers, counselors, et al, know this is an issue for you. You have reached out for help, you whole heartedly appreciate their patience, understanding, and grace while you fight for transcendental control and peace. Opening up and engaging can only be beneficial for everyone. Live your best life… Sandy

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