We are Family. 2016-04-04

FamilyFamilies. Gotta love ’em. Really???  We all have a family or at least had one. At best we would have two parents and all that comes with that, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, our own partners, children, extended family, etc. It takes a village after all. It’s nearly impossible to have a meeting-of-the-minds one-on-one symbiotic relationship in love or at least in like with each and every person. There’s certainly unrest and often discord between you and at least one other member of your family. I know nobody alive today who gets along with every last blood brother. As they say, you can’t pick your family, but you can pick your friends.

I would like to believe that we want to be in a positive relationship with our family. After all, that’s the very root of the word ‘relation’ship. There’s no other group  of which we share the same commonality — our ancestral heritage. But why can’t we pull this miracle of miracles off? BECAUSE WE’RE HUMANS, THAT’S WHY!!! We’re just too much alike; we’re just too different; and we think everything through and through to the point of exhaustion.

Each family unit encompasses the best and worst of who we are as a species. There’s the leader, the sensible one, the loving one, the funny one, smart one, self-centered one,  smart aleck, mean one, lazy one, good looking one,  successful one, artist, gossip, fat one, religious one, sickly one, one we think certainly is bipolar, bum, addict, con artist, dangerous one, etc. etc. It’s everything that makes up society all in one little functional, dysfunctional, loving, living, breathing package.

Get-togethers like reunions, weddings, funerals, et al are met with hugs, you’re looking good comments, we’ll have to get together more often hollow throw-outs… all the while not meaning most or all of it. Why? Because we continue to try to honor our biological connections in some way. Before an outing we can be heard saying. “I have to do ‘family stuff’ today,” as though it was a dreaded punishment.

Learning to navigate through your own family is like maneuvering through a minefield, let alone living in a world with billions of these subgroups interconnected by six degrees of separation.  Sometimes six degrees does not seem nearly enough, does it?

Love conducted through formed alliances, or discord making the decision to cut yourself from the herd — each and every interaction has a separate and unique kinship or disconnect.

Can’t we all just get along?”  ~ Rodney King

Well, no; no, we can’t.

How can we ever expect differing countries to arrive at world peace if we can’t even get along with the guy in front of us in line at Walmart paying with change. “Are those pennies?!? They are pennies! You’ve got to be kidding me! We’ll be here all day!! It’s cutting into our going to Cracker Barrel for breakfast time, and then our plans to do nothing the rest of the day.” And then there’s the co-worker with the annoying loud laugh. “I can’t take this person one more second. I sure wish I was sitting across from someone who was sad, at least they’d be quiet.” How about the awkward kid in school whose shoes are always untied and comes way too close to your face when they talk. You know, every annoying person EVER!!

As to my family spread out all over this great country of ours: I love you all, but there are some of you I must admit I just don’t always like that much. But, seriously, we need to get together more often… Sandy

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