Moronic commercials grate on me like a pea under a mattress to the fabled Princess. Not only are they moronic, but they are repeated over and over and over again; sometimes for years. Like you, I love some commercials like the Hump Daaaayyyyy! Camel. Okay, I get it – har har har. After awhile that brilliant gem also wore out its welcome. The funnier and more clever, the shorter the commercial’s shelf-life before assuredly resulting in channel surfing. I got it the 1st time let alone the 500th. Some advertisers run the same commercial back-to-back in the same break. Good grief, didn’t we just see that? Insurance humor. Who doesn’t think insurance and automatically think hilarity. Yah, you took the price tool and somehow were able to drive away from the dealer lot with a car. Whatever. The drug commercials show active people in complete harmony with nature whose lives have been changed for the better while the voiceover spews in rapid fire all the ways it can kill you. How many of us have actually gone into the doctor and said,”You know, Doc, I’ve been seeing this commercial that says I need to ask you about taking this.” I really don’t know any doctor who would say, “Well, that sounds like a great idea. I’ll call that in for you.” If they do, get a second opinion. Many drug commercials are followed by lawyers extending a welcome to those having taken that very substance to get in on the pending class action suit against the manufacturer before time runs out. Let’s not forget that we can walk the beaches of Figi by staring at a small screen on the console of the latest exerciser while whipping ourselves into shape. That’s always been a dream of mine. You? Pizza, pizza, pizza. Call for a pizza. I’d like to, but don’t know too many places that will do the 50-mile drive to deliver us a cold pizza. Glasses. You get two pairs. Two pairs? That sounds good, but I’m the one whose glasses are never $78, more like $878.
In my lifetime commercials have gone from the 15- or 30-second sound bites to the long drawn-out infomercial. A whole 1/2 hour of why this makeup will take your face back to infancy; a knife set that lets you slice a tomato so thin you can read a newspaper through it (which is something I always wished I could do).The music of our lives in a 200-CD set (I have to have that so I can store them in a drawer never to be heard). The vacuum that will suck the dirt out of your life. We all throw marbles on the floor just to test the effectiveness of our cleaning device, don’t we? Hair products that work miracles on your locks. How pretty. I would love to spend hundreds of dollars a month just to get in on the lawsuit against the makers because my hair has started falling out.
There’s program teasers in a continuous loop from one week to another. Why tune in to the dang show? The best or funniest parts are in the teaser we’ve seen four dozen times. I look forward to the show finally airing just to stop the relentless tune-in-and-watch commercials. It’s a short-lived reprieve though because it immediately triggers the cycle again for next week’s program.,
I am grateful for commercials because they help to fund the programming we all enjoy. They allow us to only pay a small house payment every month to our cable or satellite provider for the privilege of watching ‘free’ TV. DVR’s have made it more possible for people to catch their shows and fast forward through the commercials. All of us do not have those brilliant machines, however. You can add pay channels to your provider package like HBO, Showtime, Stars, and Encore padding your already obscene bill. There’s streaming services like Netflix, Vudu, and Amazon where you pay them a separate fee outside of your normal provider to download programs into your home or office bypassing commercials entirely. The only time commercials are openly welcomed into American homes with open arms is during the Super Bowl. Somehow the NFL has pulled off the miracle of miracles. People actually looking forward to watching commercials. Of course, we’ve made it into a game where we weigh in with our opinions on Twitter and Facebook resulting in a national ranking by likeability and poignancy.
Hawking wares, free enterprise system, and capitalism in all its glory. Buy, buy, buy! Sue, Sue sue! Eat, eat, eat! Watch, watch, watch!
I guess we should thank commercials. They allowed us to enjoy real free TV before the current $$ progression. Spoofs on commercials are usually more entertaining than the actual commercials. I remember laughing to Johnny Carson’s Tea Time Movie pitchman on the Tonight Show. It makes me chuckle to this day just thinking about it. Commercials gave us a love/hate relationship with the medium and motivated innovators to go forth and be down with their bad selves by inventing methods and devices just to avoid the ever-loving commercial.
God bless America!… Sandy